I Hope I Never Forget...

...how my heart jumped and how fiercely I cried in joy when Garett said 'it's a girl!'.

...how helpless she was when she was first born, before she could even lift her head to look in our eyes.

...how amazed we were that something so beautiful came from us.

...how she slumped down in her car seat on the way home from the hospital, because she was so little, even the infant seat was too big.

...how worried we were those first two weeks when she was still trying to beat the jaundice, and wasn't gaining weight.

...how powerfully it hurt me to hear her cries during the bilirubin screenings.

...how nervous we were the first time we gave her a big girl bath.

...how excited we were when we took her in for a weight check, and she was finally back to her birth weight.

...how hard we both laughed at her startle reflex after G let out a huge belch.

...how her little body gets heavier and she loses all muscle composure when she gets really tired.

...how her head smells after a shampoo.

...how thrilled we were the first time she rolled, and how we watched with anticipation and the camera rolling to make sure we caught it the next time.

...the weight of her head against my shoulder.

...the sound of her coo, her laugh and her little baby sneezes and coughs.

...the way she's strengthened my love for Garett and made the two of us into a family.

I know there are a million more memories to come, but I pray as time passes I never lose these precious ones from Campbell's first three months.

Cutest. Baby. Eh-vur.

We took Campbell in for her three month portraits yesterday and took a few family shots as well. She got a little sleepy, but overall was very cooperative, and we ended up with some fantastic pictures.

She's doing really well - I want to brag on her sleeping through the night, but I'm so afraid I'm going to jinx it! She usually goes down between eight and nine, then we get her back up around 10:30 to squeeze a couple more ounces in to her, and she goes right back down without a fuss and sleeps until some time between six and seven.

Her physical therapy is going well, too. She still has about a 20 degree tilt, though, so we're going to need to keep it up a few more weeks.

We're sailing right along! It's so hard to believe she's already three months old. I was looking at these photos compared to the ones we took at Father's Day when she was about six weeks, and it's amazing how much she's changed already. She's so much more aware and alert, and is already developing her own little personality. She smiles, laughs, coos, and she definitely recognizes her mommy and daddy. We made up this poster to hang on the wall by her crib at daycare so she won't be lonely during the day - we need a picture of her with her Grandpa Alan!

I'll leave you with this. I call it, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful."

One week down, a lifetime to go

I started back to work on Monday, and it was hard to leave Campbell at day care, though I think I shed more tears last Friday, looking at her and holding her and thinking about how I wouldn't be able to do that during the week anymore. I wasn't planning on going with Garett to actually drop her off because I thought it would be too hard, but we decided it would better for us both to be there in case there were any questions, and so we'd both know the drill. I did pretty well, only getting weepy after we actually left the room and looked back and she was on the other side of the glass windows.

Luckily, I've gone back to a job that I really like and a great team of co-workers. They even decorated my cube, complete with a pretend-Campbell, so I wouldn't be lonely. I've been easing back in this week; the woman who was covering for me while I was on leave is still here for one more week, so the transition is going really smoothly.

It's hard to believe, but Campbell was 12 weeks yesterday. She's not officially 3 months until the 23rd, so we're waiting until next week to have her 3 month pictures taken. She's doing really well with her eating and sleeping, taking between 25 and 29 ounces a day in six bottles (usually four oz. bottles, with an extra ounce thrown in here and there). She goes down between 9 pm and 10 pm, and generally sleeps through to the 5 a.m. hour. I wish I was more of a morning person so I could get up, feed her, and actually start my day with a workout or walk or something, but usually I get up, feed and change her, and go back to bed for an hour or so.

Her physical therapist said she's showing improvement in her range of motion - she can look all the way over her left shoulder now. We still need some more work on pulling her right ear down to her right shoulder, so we'll keep up the stretches. Because of the plagiocephaly, it's very likely that Campbell will need to wear a cranial band for a few months. We have an appointment at Star Cranial in Addison in a few weeks so they can assess her need.

She's a wonderful baby - only cries when she's hungry or super tired, rarely even gets fussy in the evening. She goes right down at bedtime, and puts herself back to sleep when she wakes up in the night (I can hear her talking to herself on the monitor, but she never even cries before falling back asleep). She's beautiful, and precious, and everything we could hope for in a baby girl. Hopefully I'll get the last couple of things up in her nursery this weekend so I can post pics of her pretty room!

To the left, to the left

We took Campbell in for her first physical therapy appointment on Wednesday, and the doc seconded the diagnosis of torticollis. To try and help stretch out and lengthen the muscles on the left side of her neck, we have to do daily exercises, including pulling her head to the side so her right ear touches her right shoulder and pushing her chin to make her look left. 3-4 times a day, 5 reps, holding 5 secs each time. We also need to maximize her tummy time, lay her on her left side and place rolled up blankets on either side of her head in the car seat and swing to encourage her to look over her midline. The doc's assessment was that her head is pretty asymmetrical - she got a 13/15, with 15 being the most asymmetrical. The back right side is flattened out, and if you look at her down from the top, you can see the distinct difference in the distance from her eyebrow to hairline on the left and right sides.

Right now, we're doing the exercises about 30 mins after every meal (except the 4 am feeding - I'm not putting either one of us through that, and besides, she'll be dropping that feeding any day now, right?). She'll also go to physical therapy once a week, at least until the end of July. Then the doc will decide the next steps. It's going to get a little harder after I go back to work and she starts day care. We can ask them to try and help - place toys to her left, carry her on the right shoulder to encourage her to look left... but, they'll have other kids to watch and likely won't have time to do her stretches. In other news, she's up to taking 4 oz. of formula at each feeding, and we've transitioned her completely to milk-based formula. (We started her on soy b/c when we were supplementing the breast milk, she threw up the first couple of milk-based bottles we gave her, but I think we were just overfilling her at that time...) There's nothing particularly bad about the soy based formula, but it's like 47% corn syrup, and that just seemed wrong to me.

Only one week left of maternity leave. It will be nice to be back in the 'real world', but it's going to be very difficult to turn her care over to someone else, and I really will miss just being able to see her and hold her all day.